Masquerade

masquerade : (from google dictionary)

• A false show or pretense
• The wearing of disguise

The Development of beauty industry is beginning to get a hold of people mind.We were told and make believe that beauty comes from what cream you wear or what make up you put on.
It is sad for me that good looking is no longer comes from the beauty of God creation or from what lies deep inside.The more i see it the more i took a pity on people who think that their well being is because what they put on them, not what they truly are.

If people like you or love you by the things you wear, you should get away from them, because sooner or later it will fall apart and gone.

I have a friend and find her very good looking, not because what they put on their face, because they smile a lot, they are easy to please, they are outgoing and have a good attitude and they help a lot without nagging.Sure one of them have pimples, one have a buck tooth and the other have a little eyes.But it does not deny the attractiveness of they appearance.

You should see people of what they are, not what they wear and the beauty of their being.Sometimes when you are with a right people they bring the best of you.Or when you are in love or in the right hormone cycle (so the scientist said).

Don't get me wrong i do not oppose people who wear make up, i still get to enjoy a nice view when i see one,and i encourage people to look well groom,but you should feel good about yourself when you are not wearing even anything.You should understand that if you judge yourself with that and then you will judge people with it and what goes around comes around.You will be surrounded by shallow people who cannot see pass through your face cream or louis vuitton bag.

When you say to people to do not judge the book by its cover, and why you feel important about the cover for yourself ?

I am not Sorry

Forgiveness is something that we cannot have it easily this days.People trying to hurt others neither they realize it or not.Sometimes we care nothing for any action we make or any words we said to others.

"Please stop before you feel sorry about anything you said" -=You’ve got mail=-

Living in this fast pace world of information we could not control any longer all the things we know or hear or watch or see….things just keep coming and going really fast.

Sometimes the abuse of our tools God create us to gather information is just as normal as sunrise.

How many hours we have to look at email,commercials and newspaper ?

How many hour we have to hear things that we shouldn’t or don’t want to hear ?

Input must determine the output more or less.When i study computer programming i learn GIGO (Garbage in ,Garbage Out).What comes in will eventually comes out.

If you put something positive in the system,then it will (hopefully) comes a positive result.

But if you put something negative in the system,soon or latter the negative will find a way to come out.

Choose your input !!

If there is any option you have to make everyday…choose positive.Stop reading,hearing,seeing,watching negative news…it won’t kill you..but it will get you killed someday.Start yearning for positive input.

Ugh head…ouch…ouch….positive…..positive…….

Eenie, Meenie , Minee, Moo

I pray you’ll be our eyes, and watch us where we go.
And help us to be wise in times when we don’t know
Let this be our prayer, as we go our way
Lead us to the place, guide us with your grace
To a place where we’ll be safe

-= The Prayer - Michelle Brach and Josh Groban =-

Sometimes it’s hard to see beyond the choice we have to make and it is easier for us to blame others when the consequences from our choices come to challenge us.

I hate when my friends tell me about their problem with their spouse/partner.It’s like they don’t realize the choice they make and the promise they take.I mean somebody doesn’t have to put a gun against their head when they decide to get married rite ?

A lack of understanding from their mind is what cause them to make blow up on the real problem.That’s why they should read "Don’t sweat the small stuff in love" (i’m not into this book thou,but as a matter a fact a lot of couple is..sweating on the small stuff).The bump on the love road is just …a bump.It’s not like a nuclear strike or Carpet bombing.Just undergo the bump…together.The ability to see beyond choices is very necessary to a healthy love life and we can practice it in our personal life (before you involve everybody else in your mess).

So when the tides comes (because the choice you make) you already prepare the boat and the safety jacket.

It take a Heaven of courage to make a decission,but it takes double of the effort to face the consequences. -= Sondi=-

The Secret of my Happiness

My friend once asked me this question:

"why we cannot give our hope to someone that we love ? Isn’t dreams and hopes that keep us alive ? I just don’t get it".

Sometimes we cannot differentiate between hope and expectancies…You expect someone to come at 2 o’clock…bring you flower and candy…but they didn’t show up at all…and you get pissed by their behavior.But when you hope…you cannot get disappointed….hope is something higher,doesn’t have a moral issue.

My all time favorite motto is "Hope for the best and always prepare for the worst" so in that kind of attitude you don’t have to loose your grip in life.But, of course as a being (who try to define who he really are) i slip a couple of times (and that’s a good thing),When i make mistake i learn something to perfect my skill in dealing with life.

The secret of my happiness is Love someone unconditionally…my love is free just like God give us air to breath, God didn’t choose who can breath by whether you do good or bad things in life. So i try to make my love FREE for somebody,they don’t have to love me back…they didn’t even have to like me to have my love for them…in that way i can never expect them to react and do something as i want them to be.It’s really hard..but i’m getting better at it why ?because it’s release me from stress,from disappointment,from anger and it give me a lot of time to fill a happiness in my life.

I learn not to be afraid about loosing them and it set me free…set my heart free.

I enjoy all the small things they give me (even the slightest smile from their face as i express my love to them is enough for me).How can i do that ? because i set my mental at abundant level (try reading "7 highly effective people" by Steven covey).I feel that my love never depleted…because all the people that love me and…God.

Love,especially mine is like a glass and a jar….a glass is myself…a jar is my love.So if i want to love myself i pour my love to my glass (mind you that the jar never be empty)

If i said i love somebody,i pour my love to myself until it was full and the love just out of my glass to other glass….so i will never have an empty glass and my love for others is merely the abundant love from my glass…

also i receive love from other glass….but sometimes they don’t have (or didn’t notice) that they have a jar.So they need other liquid from other glass to make their glass full…if their glass empty (because they give the love liquid to somebody they love) they became sad,self pity and feel useless .Then comes the terms "conditional love" …i give you my love only if you give me yours….(to fill my glass back).

But my glass is always full,and other love that pour on my glass brings another color of my love liquid…so i don’t need anybody to pour their love on me (because my glass is always full) but when they do i become much more colorful (and i thank you for all of you that pour your love on my glass) and i can share more love to other glass for there is no such things as useless love.

My good friend of mine told me this lovely sentences "The seeds that ever been cast will never return for nothing"…that’s why a cast my love to others…even if it doesn’t come back for me, i believe…someone, somewhere will have their love shared…..

"For love is all we are and always will be"

Pasca Tsunami Jepang

Catatan Pengingat bagi semua

Catatan ini ditulis oleh seorang mahasiswi yang sedang sekolah di Jepang. Bukan mau bergaya karena sekolah di Jepang, akan tetapi arti dari cacatan ini yang patut dijadikan renungan dan peringatan bagi kita. (diambil dari e-mail yang dikirim oleh : SM.Dar...mastuti Tjitrodihardjo tanggal 16 Maret 2011 kepada mailinglist DIKTI) Say YES to GAMBARU! By Rouli Esther Pasaribu

Terus terang aja, satu kata yang bener2 bikin muak jiwa raga setelah tiba di Jepang dua tahun lalu adalah : GAMBARU alias berjuang mati-matian sampai titik darah penghabisan. Muak abis, sumpah, karena tiap kali bimbingan sama prof, kata-kata penutup selalu : motto gambattekudasai (ayo berjuang lebih lagi), taihen dakedo, isshoni gambarimashoo (saya tau ini sulit, tapi ayo berjuang bersama-sama) , motto motto kenkyuu shitekudasai (ayo bikin penelitian lebih dan lebih lagi). Sampai gw rasanya pingin ngomong, apa ngga ada kosa kata lain selain GAMBARU? apaan kek gitu, yang penting bukan gambaru.

Gambaru itu bukan hanya sekadar berjuang2 cemen gitu2 aja yang kalo males atau ada banyak rintangan, ya udahlah ya...berhenti aja. Menurut kamus bahasa jepang sih, gambaru itu artinya : "doko made mo nintai shite doryoku suru" (bertahan sampai kemana pun juga dan berusaha abis-abisan).Gambaru itu sendiri, terdiri dari dua karakter yaitu karakter "keras" dan "mengencangkan". Jadi image yang bisa didapat dari paduan karakter ini adalah "mau sesusah apapun itu persoalan yang dihadapi, kita mesti keras dan terus mengencangkan diri sendiri, agar kita bisa menang atas persoalan itu" (maksudnya jangan manja, tapi anggap semua persoalan itu adalah sebuah kewajaran dalam hidup, namanya hidup emang pada dasarnya susah, jadi jangan ngarep gampang, persoalan hidup hanya bisa dihadapi dengan gambaru, titik.).

Terus terang aja, dua tahun gw di jepang, dua tahun juga gw ngga ngerti, kenapa orang2 jepang ini menjadikan gambaru sebagai falsafah hidupnya.

Bahkan anak umur 3 tahun kayak Joanna pun udah disuruh gambaru di sekolahnya, kayak pake baju di musim dingin mesti yang tipis2 biar ngga manja terhadap cuaca dingin, di dalam sekolah ngga boleh pakai kaos kaki karena kalo telapak kaki langsung kena lantai itu baik untuk kesehatan, sakit2 dikit cuma ingus meler2 atau demam 37 derajat mah ngga usah bolos sekolah, tetap dihimbau masuk dari pagi sampai sore, dengan alasan, anak akan kuat menghadapi penyakit jika ia melawan penyakitnya itu sendiri. Akibatnya, kalo naik sepeda di tanjakan sambil bonceng Joanna, dan gw ngos2an kecapean, otomatis Joanna ngomong : Mama, gambare! mama faitoooo! (mama ayo berjuang, mama ayo fight!).

Pokoknya jangan manja sama masalah deh, gambaru sampe titik darah penghabisan it's a must!

Gw bener2 baru mulai sedikit mengerti mengapa gambaru ini penting banget dalam hidup, adalah setelah terjadi tsunami dan gempa bumi dengan kekuatan 9.0 di jepang bagian timur. Gw tau, bencana alam di indonesia seperti tsunami di aceh, nias dan sekitarnya, gempa bumi di padang, letusan gunung merapi....juga bukanlah hal yang gampang untuk dihadapi. Tapi, tsunami dan gempa bumi di jepang kali ini, jauuuuuh lebih parah dari semuanya itu. Bahkan, ini adalah gempa bumi dan tsunami terparah dan terbesar di dunia.

Wajaaaaaaar banget kalo kemudian pemerintah dan masyarakat jepang panik kebingungan karena bencana ini. Wajaaaaar banget kalo mereka kemudian mulai ngerasa galau, nangis2, ga tau mesti ngapain. Bahkan untuk skala bencana sebesar ini, rasanya bisa "dimaafkan" jika stasiun-stasiun TV memasang sedikit musik latar ala lagu-lagu ebiet dan membuat video klip tangisan anak negeri yang berisi wajah-wajah korban bencana yang penuh kepiluan dan tatapan kosong tak punya harapan.

Bagaimana tidak, tsunami dan gempa bumi ini benar-benar menyapu habis seluruh kehidupan yang mereka miliki. Sangat wajar jika kemudian mereka tidak punya harapan. Tapi apa yang terjadi pasca bencana mengerikan ini? Dari hari pertama bencana, gw nyetel TV dan nungguin lagu-lagu ala ebiet diputar di stasiun TV. Nyari-nyari juga di mana rekening dompet bencana alam. Video klip tangisan anak negeri juga gw tunggu2in. Tiga unsur itu (lagu ala ebiet, rekening dompet bencana, video klip tangisan anak negeri), sama sekali ngga disiarkan di TV. Jadi yang ada apaan dong?
Ini yang gw lihat di stasiun2 TV :
1. Peringatan pemerintah agar setiap warga tetap waspada.

2. Himbauan pemerintah agar seluruh warga jepang bahu membahu menghadapi bencana (termasuk permintaan untuk menghemat listrik agar warga di wilayah tokyo dan tohoku ngga lama-lama terkena mati lampu).

3. Permintaan maaf dari pemerintah karena terpaksa harus melakukan pemadaman listrik terencana.

4. Tips-tips menghadapi bencana alam.

5. nomor telepon call centre bencana alam yang bisa dihubungi 24 jam.

6. Pengiriman tim SAR dari setiap perfektur menuju daerah-daerah yang terkena bencana

7. Potret warga dan pemerintah yang bahu membahu menyelamatkan warga yang terkena bencana (sumpah sigap banget, nyawa di jepang benar-benar bernilai banget harganya).

8. Pengobaran semangat dari pemerintah yang dibawakan dengan gaya tenang dan tidak emosional : mari berjuang sama-sama menghadapi bencana, mari kita hadapi (government official pake kata norikoeru, yang kalo diterjemahkan secara harafiah : menaiki dan melewati) dengan sepenuh hati.

9. Potret para warga yang terkena bencana, yang saling menyemangati : *ada yang nyari istrinya, belum ketemu2, mukanya udah galau banget, tapi tetap tenang dan ngga emosional, disemangati nenek2 yang ada di tempat pengungsian : gambatte sagasoo! kitto mitsukaru kara. Akiramenai de (ayo kita berjuang cari istri kamu. Pasti ketemu. Jangan menyerah)

*Tulisan di twitter : ini gempa terbesar sepanjang sejarah. Karena itu, kita mesti memberikan usaha dan cinta terbesar untuk dapat melewati bencana ini; Gelap sekali di Sendai, lalu ada satu titik bintang terlihat terang. Itu bintang yang sangat indah. Warga Sendai, lihatlah ke atas.

Sebagai orang Indonesia yang tidak pernah melihat cara penanganan bencana ala gambaru kayak gini, gw bener-bener merasa malu dan di saat yang bersamaan : kagum dan hormat banget sama warga dan pemerintah Jepang.

Ini negeri yang luar biasa, negeri yang sumber daya alamnya terbatas banget, negeri yang alamnya keras, tapi bisa maju luar biasa dan punya mental sekuat baja, karena : falsafah gambaru-nya itu.

Bisa dibilang, orang-orang jepang ini ngga punya apa-apa selain GAMBARU. Dan, gambaru udah lebih dari cukup untuk menghadapi segala persoalan dalam hidup.

Bener banget, kita mesti berdoa, kita mesti pasrah sama Tuhan.Hanya, mental yang apa-apa "nyalahin" Tuhan, bilang2 ini semua kehendakNya, Tuhan marah pada umatNya, Tuhan marah melalui alam maka tanyalah pada rumput yang bergoyang... .. I guarantee you 100 percent, selama masih mental ini yang berdiam di dalam diri kita, sampai kiamat sekalipun, gw rasa bangsa kita ngga akan bisa maju.

Kalau ditilik lebih jauh, "menyalahkan" Tuhan atas semua bencana dan persoalan hidup, sebenarnya adalah kata lain dari ngga berani bertanggungjawab terhadap hidup yang dianugerahkan Sang Pemilik Hidup.

Jika diperjelas lagi, ngga berani bertanggungjawab itu maksudnya : lari dari masalah, ngga mau ngadepin masalah, main salah2an, ngga mau berjuang dan baru ketemu sedikit rintangan aja udah nangis manja.

Kira-kira setahun yang lalu, ada sanak keluarga yang mempertanyakan, untuk apa gw menuntut ilmu di Jepang. Ngapain ke Jepang, ngga ada gunanya, kalo mau S2 atau S3 mah, ya di eropa atau amerika sekalian, kalo di Jepang mah nanggung. Begitulah kata beliau.
Sempat terpikir juga akan perkataannya itu, iya ya, kalo mau go international ya mestinya ke amrik atau eropa sekalian, bukannya jepang ini. Toh sama-sama asia, negeri kecil pula dan kalo ga bisa bahasa jepang, ngga akan bisa survive di sini.

Sampai sempat nyesal juga,kenapa gw ngedaleminnya sastra jepang dan bukan sastra inggris atau sastra barat lainnya. Tapi sekarang, gw bisa bilang dengan yakin sama sanak keluarga yang menyatakan ngga ada gunanya gw nuntut ilmu di jepang.

Pernyataan beliau adalah salah sepenuhnya.Mental gambaru itu yang paling megang adalah jepang. Dan menjadikan mental gambaru sebagai way of life adalah lebih berharga daripada go international dan sejenisnya itu.

Benar, sastra jepang, gender dan sejenisnya itu, bisa dipelajari di mana saja. Tapi, semangat juang dan mental untuk tetap berjuang abis-abisan biar udah ngga ada jalan, gw rasa, salah satu tempat yang ideal untuk memahami semua itu adalah di jepang.

Dan gw bersyukur ada di sini, saat ini. Maka, mulai hari ini, jika gw mendengar kata gambaru, entah di kampus, di mall, di iklan-iklan TV, di supermarket, di sekolahnya joanna atau di mana pun itu, gw tidak akan lagi merasa muak jiwa raga.

Sebaliknya, gw akan berucap dengan rendah hati : Indonesia jin no watashi ni gambaru no seishin to imi wo oshietekudasatte, kokoro kara kansha itashimasu. Nihon jin no minasan no yoo ni, gambaru seishin wo mi ni tsukeraremasu yoo ni, hibi gambatteikitai to omoimasu.

(Saya ucapkan terima kasih dari dasar hati saya karena telah mengajarkan arti dan mental gambaru bagi saya, seorang Indonesia. Saya akan berjuang tiap hari, agar mental gambaru merasuk dalam diri saya, seperti kalian semuanya, orang-orang Jepang). Say YES to GAMBARU!

Valentine 2011

Since this is Valentine's day i guess it is right if i try to compose some romantic poem.But, i am not a romantic person (well at least i see myself that way).

I just going to quote some of my favorite love songs:

Cause when i close my eyes i still can see your smile,bright enough to light my life out of my darkest hour. -= Gloria Estefan - I See your smile =-

I believe my heart,What else can I do? When every part of every thought leads me straight to you. -= Duncan and Keedie - I Believe my heart =-

When God made you He must have been thinking about me.
-= Newsong - When God made you =-

You Are The Love Of My Life One thing that's good in this life I'll spend the rest of my days Just loving you -= George Benson - You are the love of my life =-

Then say you'll share with me one love, One lifetime Let me lead you from your solitude.
-= Jim Brickman - All i ask of you =-

You'll always be a part of me I'm part of you indefinitely girl don't you know you can't escape me oh darling cause you'll always be my baby -= David Cook - Always be my baby =-

We've got an everlasting love So pure divine We've got an everlasting love Our love will last for all time
-= Gerard Joling - everlasting love =-

Any time you miss me any time you're lonely Call on me and I'll be there
-= BVSMP - Anytime =-

Ooh baby I love your way every day Wanna tell you I love your way
-= Peter Frampton -Baby i love your way =-

Every heartbeat bears your name Loud and clear, they stake my claim Ask anyone, and they'll tell you it's true And every heartbeat belongs to you -= Amy Grant - every hearbeat =-

You're my sunshine after the rain You're the cure against my fear and my pain.
-= 98 degree - its all because of you =-

For every dream you made come true For all the love I found in you I'll be forever thankful baby -= Celine dion - because you loved me =-

That Love has found a cloudy day I'm here to say that I was born to love you
-= George duke - born to love you =-


And I can't fight this feeling anymore. I've forgotten what I started fighting for.
-= REO Speedwagon - Can't fight this feeling =-

Why do stars fall down from the sky Every time you walk by? Just like me, they long to be Close to you. -= The Carpenter - Close to you =-

I'm crazy for you Touch me once and you'll know it's true I never wanted anyone like this.
-= Madonna - crazy for you =-

And there's nowhere in the world I'd rather be Than here in my room, dreaming with you endlessly -= Selena -Dreaming of you =-

Well, for me, it's waking up beside you To watch the sun rise on your face To know that I can say I love you At any given time or place -= Ruben Studard - Flying without wings =-

From this moment as long as I live I will love you, I promise you this
-= Shania Twain - From this moment =-

You keep me standing tall You help me through it all I'm always strong when you're beside me
-= Peter Cetera - Glory of love =-

I want to thank you for all the music and lyrics that you shared with me.

For me Valentine is also the time to say thank you for the loves that you share,even when i am not notice it,i still thank you all for the intention.

Love, Peace and Unity

Sondi

Chow yun Fat

Pada suatu hari

Penelepon: Halo. Apakah ini kediaman Chow Yun-fat?

Pelayan: Maaf, Anda salah sambung, ini kediaman Keluarga Lin. (Telepon ditutup)

Tidak lama kemudian



Penelepon: Halo. Apakah ini kediaman Chow Yun-fat?

Pelayan: Salah sambung! Ini kediaman Keluarga Lin. (Telepon ditutup)

Beberapa saat kemudian



Penelepon: Halo.

Pelayan: Lagi-lagi kamu! Awas ya! Walau saya cuma pelayan, tapi bisa lapor polisi!

Penelepon: Apakah ini kediaman keluarga Lin?

Pelayan: Aduh ... maaf, maaf... tadi soalnya ada beberapa kali salah sambung. Mau cari siapa?

Penelepon: Chow Yun-fat.

Pelayan: ??!!@#@$!! (Telepon ditutup)
Syai: Sejenak kemudian



Penelepon: Halo.

Pelayan: Kamu lagi...kamu lagi...!!!

Penelepon: Saya Mr. Lin

Pelayan: Aduh! Maaf, tuan! Maaf, dari tadi ada orang gila telepon ke sini berkali-kali. Ada perlu apa tuan?

Penelepon: Panggilkan Chow Yun-fat.

Pelayan: ...(pingsan)... (Telepon ditutup)



Akhirnya



Penelepon: Halo!

Pelayan: Mau cari siapa, tuan?

Penelepon: Ini kediaman Keluarga Lin?

Pelayan: Iya, betul.

Penelepon: Saya Chow Yun-fat. Tadi ada orang cari saya?

Luke 10, 25:37

10:25 A teacher of the Law came up and tried to trap Jesus. "Teacher," he asked, "what must I do to receive eternal life?"
10:26 Jesus answered him, "What do the Scriptures say? How do you interpret them?"
10:27 The man answered, " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your strength, and with all your mind'; and 'Love your neighbor as you love yourself.' "
10:28 "You are right," Jesus replied; "do this and you will live."
10:29 But the teacher of the Law wanted to justify himself, so he asked Jesus, "Who is my neighbor?"
10:30 Jesus answered, "There was once a man who was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho when robbers attacked him, stripped him, and beat him up, leaving him half dead.
10:31 It so happened that a priest was going down that road; but when he saw the man, he walked on by on the other side.
10:32 In the same way a Levite also came there, went over and looked at the man, and then walked on by on the other side.
10:33 But a Samaritan who was traveling that way came upon the man, and when he saw him, his heart was filled with pity.
10:34 He went over to him, poured oil and wine on his wounds and bandaged them; then he put the man on his own animal and took him to an inn, where he took care of him.
10:35 The next day he took out two silver coins and gave them to the innkeeper. 'Take care of him,' he told the innkeeper, 'and when I come back this way, I will pay you whatever else you spend on him.' "
10:36 And Jesus concluded, "In your opinion, which one of these three acted like a neighbor toward the man attacked by the robbers?"
10:37 The teacher of the Law answered, "The one who was kind to him." Jesus replied, "You go, then, and do the same."

I do not know why but the gospel yesterday made me think (yeah..i can think .....sometimes).
That particular reading is to tell us explicitly that salvation is not for what you believe,or who you are,what religion you have,what society you belong,its something that you DO.
the example is on luke 10:31 above, the priest which is the symbol and the highest shepherd in the society is not care about the "neighbor".
on Luke 10:32 the levite (according to Wikipedia) is the GOD Chosen Israelite is also not the "neighbor".
It is the Samaritan thats became "the neighbor" (according to Wikipedia is the rejected tribe,low life citizen [but not necessary poor] that have no faith in God [Jewish God particularly] ).

Jesus also teach us that living the teaching of God will affect All of human being...not just for Christian people.

Sometimes i became very sad when people trying to help others is judge for "forced evangelist",just because we help others that not Christian in religion.What even make me more sad...they stop doing good to other because they afraid if the stigma.

Maybe not all of you will agree with me,but if we want to help others (Wisely, of course) we help them anyway without afraid any prejudice they will give us in the end.For doing an act of love and compassion is not something we should be afraid of...no matter the consequences.

So ..be not afraid

1 Corinthian 13:13 Meanwhile these three remain: faith, hope, and love; and the greatest of these is love.

This is what i believe...DO NOT LET your faith and hope makes you not doing LOVE

Favourite Quotes

Gue bersyukur waktu gue kuliah gue bisa berkenalan dengan banyak orang yang sengaja atau tidak mengajari gue banyak hal tentang hidup dan prinsip2nya.

Gue merasa beruntung karena waktu gue sekolah gue kaga pernah diajarin itu semua…yang diajarin cuman imam bonjol lahir tahun berapa dan mati tahun berapa.Ketika gue kuliah pun yang 6 tahun itu (iya kuliah gue emang lama karena gue memperdalam ilmunya hihihihihihihih) tetep ajah kagak diajarin hal2 yang justru akan gue pake dan gue butuhkan ketika gue mulai “hidup” di “luar sana”.

Ilmu2 yang gue pelajari cuman ilmu2 gimana bikin bisnis orang laen sukses karena elo kerja disitu.Tapi bagaimana gue bisa sukses secara pribadi…ga pernah tuh diajarin.

Salah satu yang sampe sekarang gue pegang dalam hidup gue adalah nasihat dari kakak angkat gue di kuliah…walaupun dia juga kuliahnya lama hihihihih (teladan yang salah) tapi secara pribadi..dia orang yang sangat luar biasa…i want to be like him as a person.

Di suatu hari dia pernah bilang gini sama gue

“Son, kalau elo lembek sama diri elo sendiri..hidup akan keras sama elo, tapi kalau elo keras sama diri elo sendiri..hidup akan mudah bagi elo”

Prinsip ini yang akan gue ajarin ke anak gue juga.Plus satu lagi yang terngiang2 di kuping gue beberapa tahun terakhir

SUKSES ITU DIPAKSA,GAGAL OTOMATIS

Kalau mau sukses di semua bidang kita harus di paksa , kalau kegagalan sih mudah, gak usah ngapa ngapain juga kita gagal.

Waktu gue mau merit dan dapet bentuk badan yang “rada bagus” gue ikut fitness, nahhhh Personal trainer gue itu selalu berhasil menyiksa gue tiap kali gue latihan,in another word..Di-Pak-Sa.Udah kagak sanggup dan mau mati sit up…tetep ajah di paksa sampe muka elo berkerut dan merah karena nahan sakitnya otot elo ketarik.

Akhirnya…ukuran celana gue dari 38 menjadi 34 lagi…padahal itu latihannya kagak terlalu lama karena gue kecelakaan dan harus istirahat di rumah beberapa minggu.

Jadi prinsip yang di tanamkan ke gue itu benar adanya.

SEGALA SESUATU SULIT SEBELUM JADI MUDAH

jangan pernah berharap bahwa kalau kita ketemu hal baru itu langsung mudah…pasti sulit dulu kayak waktu pertama kalu belajar naik sepeda,gak tau udah jatuh berkali2 waktu belajar.Setelah udah jago…mau jatuh ajah susah.

What is monogamy ?

According to Wikipedia
Monogamy usually refers to a form of marriage in which an individual has only one spouse at any one time. However, monogamy may also refer to the more general state of having only one mate at any one time and as such may be applied to the social behavior of all animals.^[1] In current usage monogamy often refers to having one sexual partner irrespective of marriage or reproduction.

Etymologist

The word monogamy comes from the Greek words "μονός", monos which means one or alone, and "γάμος", gamos which means marriage.

Only marry once ?
Marry to yourself ?
marry alone ?

Having one sexual partner at a time ? no threesome allowed ?

funny how the animal was the one found the idea of monogamy,since human is the "higher" animal we should be doing it for a long time ago.But no,through out of history human is not a monogamist in nature.

Ancient Mesopotamia and Assyria

Both the Babylonian and Assyrian families were monogamous in principle. In the patriarchal society of Mesopotamia the nuclear family was called a "house". In order "to build a house" a man was supposed to marry one woman and if she did not provide him with offspring, he could take a second wife.Blahhhhh.....

Ancient Egypt

Monogamy is believed to be basic family model also in ancient Egypt.

The writing just stop there...seriously i doubt it.but again maybe just the king who could have a lot of concubine.

If you read the wiki about monogamy here you will find that there is a lot of things to speak about monogamy than just having sex with one person for the rest of your life.

The argue is so hot that you need one more aspect to tie it up.....love...that four words that need to be brought down from its glory to justify monogamy.It should be place to their respective idea...monogamy is just an idea.

Don't get me wrong, i choose to be monogamy,why ?A lot of things such as :

- i cannot cope with another woman because my wife is already fill my days (money,emotion,times,space) up ^_^ LOL.

- The risk of STD.

- Living in the monogamy idea neighborhood.

- Risk management of the non-monogamy idea.

- etc.

My point is, sometimes people use monogamy to justify love...and i hate that.For somebody who have a big capacity of loving it is a personal incarceration.

size..does matter

i just read the news from Kompas here

About a weird news in Papua (that's east Indonesia island where new guinea are).
If you want to be police officer you better not doing or ever do a penis enlargement procedure.

Papua is well know for a lot of methods to top up your penis size by the way.

What it got to do with it you ask ?

Well the method is often mess up with your overall health or what ever that means, and that will make you fail on the health test to join the police academy.

Genesis 15:5

15:5 The LORD took him outside and said, "Look at the sky and try to count the stars; you will have as many descendants as that."

After talking to Ellen my blog friend via phone.I suddenly have a passion to read about that particular part in the Holy Scripture.

Ellen is Batak people, Its one of the biggest tribe in Indonesia which originally come from West Sumatra.Batak people have a straightforward attitude, adventuring soul and a perk on their voices and music (well,most of them).There is a jokes about Batak people that said “when they are alone they will sing or play guitar,when there is two of them they will play chess and when there is three of them they will perform a trio”.

One of the signature things about Batak is their family name and their view about family/brotherhood.

They have a lot family name which determine where they life (in west Sumatra they divide it in 3 major area mandailing, karo and toba).Their family name such as Nasution,Napitupulu,Tobing,Simatupang,Hutapea,Simarmata and a lot of else.

So as examples when a Nasution Married a Tobing both of their family (and their relative) became family,and new the family name would be following the grooms name.

That’s why there is a lot of brothers and sisters in Batak people and they could call it their own.

I just talk to Ellen whom her nephew just arrive in Jakarta after a long time studying in USA and she said (after a week) her nephew still have a lot of family to talk and meet to.

I said to Ellen “maybe Abram is a batak people” because the promise of God that will make the descendent of Abram is as many as stars in the sky.

You can almost find Batak people in every country because of their adventuring soul.Just like Abram descendent.

“You can only find one place where there is no Batak people, its on the moon” they joked.

REGRET

Sometimes in this life we regret the choice we made or the things we said.
That's what i have been doing the whole life..regrets.

But as i grow older,read hundreds of books and hear a lot of wise people i beginning to understand something i thought really important.

Regret can only so far put you in grieve if you let them to.I learn that we could always fix things or achieve things we want eventually.If we spend enough time to let our self to grow.

Today,again i learn about regret.It seems that its all over the place in the trail of my life.

The promise to be better and the dream to be great is what i choose to have right now.

Dear Titania Natasha Part 2

I know you feel that you are have all the right to be this way. I know you are angry with her...somehow you even think not to ever forgive her. I know this is not the time to tell you how much she loves you But,let me tell you about your mom For nine month she carry you where ever she go. Hair falling from her head like crazy and doctor said it was hormone Her cheek filled with dimples and zit (you got hysteria while you got only one or two) Her feet swollen like elephant foot. Her back give up on her at the 5th month and i have to rub her back every night She never even speak or complain about you. She look ugly and fat, more than you have could imagine (but i still love her) Why i tell you this ? Because i was there..beside her,when you are not even born She have to fight 10 hour of suffering to bear you into this world. She cry to bear the pain until her tears dry away. She moan like a cattle in the slaughter house...until she have no voice She bleed after gave birth you for more than a liter Why did i tell you this ? Because i was there..the day you were born. She squeeze (literary) her breast to feed you. Bear the pain of her back to carry you until you sleep. Wake up every two hour to keep you well fed even it means she will get a migraine the next morning Sweat all over her body when she bathe you and wash the "why there is so much" bottle Why did i tell you this ? Because i was there....when you still cannot say a single words This words could go on forever... She change your diapers when she was eating..imagine that. you did that not only once my child...you cannot count it with your tiny little finger. She never speak anything bad about you. i only talk about the first year of your life.... If there is something that beats inside you..i bet you with all my ridiculous amount of happiness. That you can have what you have today, simply because she make that happen. Why i tell you this ? Because i was there...watching...and loving her as best as i could. so it could somehow pour out to you..through her. I love you..She love you more.

one of those mistake

It is funny how we could push somebody that really care about us for a moment of emotional burst.

Sometimes we have our anger in check but sometimes we don't.What we have to think is is it worth the relieve ?

I have been reading many books about relationship and there is one chapter that always relate to the self esteem.It really destroy your relationship....any relationship.

In fact there is a acronym that said LSEMBP (Low Self Esteem Means Big Problem).It really work both ways thou....if your partner have a low self esteem you must be very careful in what you say and what you do.What you think it is a normal term or in the jokes term...could end up hurting their feeling and vice versa,if you have a low self esteem everything you hear is always about you and everything you see is always there to judge you.

it is not a very healthy life to begin with and it is also a relationship destroyer.You must have a good view about yourself,what you are now and what you want to be.Try to always focus on your strength while you keep tamper your weakness.people always like to be treated equally and so are you.Always think yourself as equal as anybody else without removing a simple modesty.

Remember,what you want to say or do is based on what you think.

Think Positive and be proud about yourself.For God create you as one of a kind.

Titania Natasha

Dear Tania anakku,

Ketika kamu membaca tulisan ini mungkin kamu sedang sedih.
Mungkin kamu sedang marah dan kecewa.
Mungkin kamu merasa sendiri dan ditinggalkan.

Ijinkan aku bercerita tentang sebuah kebahagiaan....sekelumit gambar di dalam lukisan hidupku.

Tentang kuasa Tuhan yang memberikan aku seorang bayi perempuan mungil.

Tentang kengerian aku melihat penderitaan ibunya...

Tentang perjuangan panjang yang harus dihadapi ayahnya...

ahhh...terlalu panjang untuk menarik perhatian kamu....

Pada tanggal 14 Juni 2009 ada seorang bayi mungil dalam pelukanku...
ketika ku lihat wajahnya...ada kelebat orang yang aku sayangi di sana....dan hari itu aku berjanji untuk ikut menyayangi bayi itu juga.

Aku menyaksikan air mata pertamanya.
Aku menyaksikan kejap mata pertamanya.
Aku menyaksikan mulutnya terbuka.
Aku menyaksikan bibirnya yang merah.
Aku menyaksikan rambutnya yang hitam dan banyak.
Aku menyaksikan wajahnya yang bulat seperti rembulan.


Aku berdoa kepada Tuhan untuk bisa menjadi ayah terbaik untuk bayi itu..
Dengan segala ketololanku,senyumku,kekuatanku,tangisku,lelahku,harapanku,
suaraku,semangatku,keputusasaanku,ceritaku,hatiku,candaku,ototku,kakiku,
tanganku,kepalaku,otakku.

Apabila hari ini segala sesuatu itu tidak cukup untuknya..aku mau melakukannya semua sekali lagi.


Bahkan dengan nyawaku...


Bahwa hidup tidaklah pernah memberikan semua yang kamu inginkan...satu hal yang pasti aku
akan berusaha memberikan semua yang aku punya...untukmu.

Maafkan bila nanti kamu terjatuh...
Maafkan bila nanti kamu terluka...
Maafkan bila nanti kamu kecewa..
Maafkan malam-malam tanpa teman..
Maafkan pertandingan yang tidak ditonton...
Maafkan ulang tahun yang terlupakan...
Maafkan kata2 kasar dari mulutku...
Maafkan kado yang tidak sesuai dengan keinginanmu...
Maafkan gaun yang tidak bermerk terkenal..
Maafkan baju bercorak norak....
Maafkan perlilaku terhadap pacar kamu...

Maafkan semua itu karena Ayahmu sedang belajar sama seperti engkau.
Belajar berjalan seperti engkau.
Jatuh seperti engkau...
Berdarah seperti engkau..
Menangis seperti engkau..
Kecewa seperti engkau..
Limbung seperti engkau..
Perih seperti engkau..
Dapet nilai merah seperti engkau..
Bolos seperti engkau..
Nyontek seperti engkau..
Di hukum seperti engkau..

Semoga kamu sadar bahwa Ayahmu tidak lebih sempurna daripada kamu...
Semoga kamu tau di balik semua yang dialami oleh ayahmu...dia tidak ingin kamu tau....

Karena dia hanya ingin di anggap sebagai :


seorang yang paling bisa kamu andalkan..



itu saja.

Salah asuhan

Pendidikan nilai ketika masih anak2 merupakan hal yang sangat krusial di dalam kehidupan seseorang.

Nilai2 kejujuran,kerendahan hati dan compassion gue dapatkan ketika gue masih kecil.
Pada dasarnya sih gue bukan anak yang tough..terutama sebagai cowo.
Walaupun sering di gebukin sama nyokap gue..tapi gue selalu nangis karena kesakitan.
Gue tidak bisa tidak nangis kalau sampe di pukul....pake gesper (ikat pinggang) sampe kadang bengkak mengikuti bentuk ikat pinggang yang mampir ke kulit gue.Kadang kulit gue terkelupas dan berdarah saking kencangnya.

Hal itu tidak pernah membuat gue kuat atau bermental baja..malah membuat gue tertekan pada akhirnya.
Banyak orang yang di didik secara fisik bisa membuat mereka menjadi kuat dan tahan banting..not for me..gue malah jadi pengecut dan tertekan waktu masih kecil.

Gue malah melatih mental gue ketika gue ikutan wushu....karena latihan dan disiplin membantu mental gue...apalagi setelah mengerti banyak jurus2 yang diajarkan...gue sering di suruh sparing.

Dari situ gue mulai belajar menjadi orang pemberani..atau mungkin karena refleks yang di latih ketika itu.

Being tough memang penting bagi setiap orang ...terutama untuk menghadapi apapun yang ada di luar sana.

Pernah lihat bagaimana anak jalanan bergaul ? mereka jadi orang yang egois...mereka tough..tapi tidak mengerti sopan santun.....respect to others adalah hal yang mereka tidak pernah tau.

mereka merasa mereka berhak melakukan apa saja...karena mereka survive di situ.

Satu hal positif yang gue pelajari bahwa semua itu bisa berubah...asal ada moment atau bimbingan yang pas.

Mental toughness merupakan salah satu karakteristik yang ada di buku Steven Covey...itu pula yang merupakan salah satu kunci sukses...and yet tidak pernah perlu ada kekerasan untk menghasilkan mental toughness.

Yang gue pelajari dari kekerasan fisik adalah orang yang ignorant....like me back than.

Buktikan dong !

RAN - Tunjukkan Cintamu

Kuingin menunjukkan cintaku
Oh kepada belahan jiwaku
Tlah lama kumenanti waktu
Untuk mengungkapkan isi hatiku

Jangan kau berdiam dan menunggu
Cinta yang datang menghampirimu
Jika kau hanya berdiam diri
Hanya rasa sesal yang kau rasakan nanti

Tunjukkanlah rasa cintamu
Coba buat mereka tahu
Betapa indahnya dunia bila engkau sedang jatuh cinta

Berlarilah sekuat kau mampu
Hingga kau mendapatkan cintaku
Buktikan bila kau memang mau
Buat ku berikan cinta ini kepadamu

Disaat matahari bersinar
Burung - burung pun mulai berkicau
Cintaku kan selalu membentang
Untuk kau arungi bersamaku

Tunjukkanlah rasa cintamu
coba buat mereka tahu
Betapa indahnya dunia bila engkau sedang jatuh cinta



Tadi gue ceting sama temen gue...

Trus kita diskusi
mengenai bagaimana cara mengungkapkan perasaan cinta dengan tindakan.
Kalau kita memberikan statement "Aku sayang kamu"
trus....sang objek menuntut
agar kita membuktikan apa yang kita katakan.
Maka kita masuk ke dalam jebakan relativitas.
Yes, karena setiap orang mengekspresikan
sayangnya dengan cara yang berbeda.
Yang harus kita lakukan adalah
bertanya "kamu mau aku buktikannya seperti apa ?".

bagi gue,gue tau orang itu sayang sama gue kalau
dia bertanya tentang diri gue dengan pandangan mata
yang gue kenal sebagai ketulusan.

Tapi bagi orang lain tanda sayang itu artinya
elo memberikan kepada dia sesuatu barang tertentu (uang itu barang juga).
Without further judgement both of them are okay.

Temen gue yang gue ajak diskusi
bilang seperti ini (ga secara detail perkata):

"Kalau gue sih kaga mungkin
menagih pembuktian atas sayang orang itu sama gue".

"gue yakin waktu akan membuktikan
sayang dia ke gue itu nyata atau tidak".

Contoh yang bisa dia terima sebagai an act of love is:

"Waktu dia udah cape kerja,
dia masih mau masakin gue air hangat untuk mandi"

"ketika dia bisa menggeser ego dia untuk gue"

Thanks God orang yang di sayang
sama gue ga pernah minta kayak gitu (mungkin belum)

I do what i do...and if they
cannot see it as an act of my love to them

its their lost because not to be able to enjoy it.

karena motto gue adalah

"jangan pernah minta,nikmatin semua yang dikasih"

"Mendingan menerima sesuatu
karena kebebasan mereka memberi...ketimbang
menerima sesuatu karena mereka terpaksa memberi"

termasuk rasa sayang.

Banyak orang menjalin hubungan dengan demanding...
barter istilahnya...gue kasih elo ini elo kasih gue itu.
trus mereka menikah dengan memegang prinsip itu...
thats not love..thats business.
Makanya ketika salah satu pihak
sudah tidak lagi menguntungkan
(atau menjengkelkan tepatnya)

they say "bye bye love".

Jarang sekali kita menemukan cinta tak bersyarat

"senajis apapun elo ^_^..gue tetep sayang sama elo."

Bayangkan kalau ada orang yang

tetep sayang sama elo ketika elo super nyebelin....

ketika kesadaran elo kembali (entah kapan)
elo pasti akan menjadi orang yang lebih baik setelahnya.
Biasanya kalau di sinetron atau di film udah terlambat..
orang yang sayang sama elo itu udah mati.

Berani ga sih kita itu mencintai orang tanpa syarat.

mumpung masih masa paskah hehehe

Si manusia berkolor yang mati di kayu salib itu

sudah membuktikan bahwa manusia bisa...

Ibu Theresa bisa.....Gandhi bisa.....

kita seharusnya bisa...

Just and act of random kindness (ARC)

kayak inti dari film Evan Almighty.


-= The best way to find yourself is to

lose yourself in the service of others.=-

Mahatma Gandhi

Where is the love ?

This morning i read a newspaper and was shock about one of the news.

13 years old boy killed a 45 years old lady over a bicycle he does not own.The lady who was his neighbor is feel sorry for him because he cannot go to school any longer.So the lady often asked him to work at her lawn and do some errand in exchange of food and cash.

The boy interested in the old lady bicycle that he saw in her garage.The boy asked the lady a couple of times to give the bicycle to him,but the lady always ignore him.

The boy got disappointed and planning to kill the lady in result the death of the lady and he also injured the maid that also working at lady's house.

Can you imagine a 13 y.o boy ? When i was his age...i did not even have a sightliest idea on holding a grudge against anybody that much.I watch a lot of goggle V movies with a lot of "action" in it...but still it never cross my mind.

Not that i never feel disappointed at that age.Its just if i disappointed at somebody i simply does not want to show my face around that guy anymore....not kill him/her.

This case is more about value...what do you taught to your offspring about life.About love and compassion.With that kind of attitude that kid will never have an abundant life...never.

It is too bad that the newspaper does not collaborate more about his family background and stress on the event.

For me,this event remind me of my job as a parent.Make me think about it really careful and thank God i also seen a nice little kids out there and i want my child to be like them.

Maybe the lack of raw model is one of the problems with kids nowadays.

For all of you who read this post....please do as hard as you can to be a model for the child among you....you just never know what kind of influence you give to them...neither you realize it or not.


-= Your action speak so loud that they cannot hear what you say =-

pacarmu adalah adik angkatku

Gue dapet curhatan menarik nih dari sini

Curhatannya:
saia mau minta pendapat apa yg harus saia lakukan..
soalnya gua suka sama cewe yg udah punya cowonyaa....
tapi gua sayang bgt ma dia ....
untuk sementara ini dia maunya kakak- adek aja..
tapi perhatiannya dia itu berubah saat dia bilang mau kakak- adek an aja..
jadi care bangett...
gmn neeh bingungg....what im gonna do now..????
kira2 neh...bisa nggak gua ngedapetin dia....

Salah satu tanggapan dari anggota forumnya:
Nih gua bilangin, secara gw pernah ada di posisi cowok nya dan elu adalah yang kakak adiknya, kalau gw ketemu elu, dan gw tau hal itu, gw akan gantung lu di lantai paling atas gedung BNI 46 dan akan gw lempar kebawah setelah seharian gw gantung.

My Comment:

Wohoohhoohoho....kenapa sih perempuan suka mempermainkan cowo dengan kata2 kakak/adik angkat ? This is very2 ridiculous deh menurut gue.

Sebagai makluk yang punya perasaan di dengkul hihihihihihi cowo itu sangat sulit mengartikan keadaan seperti yang dialami oleh curhaters.

Cowo adalah makhluk to the point yang tidak nyaman dan rada2 pandir bila berada di daerah abu2.

I bet this is happening in a lot of life this days...i hate to break it but

"GET UP AND SMELL THE STARBUCKS"

Wahai cowo yang berada di luar sanah...jangan pernah mau jadi kakak angkat atau punya adik angkat...

pertama...cewe itu berat, mana kuat elo ngangkatnya.....lebih dari satu hari.....sedangkat status itu bisa berlangsung selama bertahun-tahun (bisa loh..bukan kudu).

Kedua....ini sama kayak legalize TTM, if you want to say that legal.Kalau dia di tanya sama cowonya dia bisa bilang dia cuman kakak gue kok...beuhh puhh leeezzz deh ah....elo kagak akan dapet apa2 kecuali perhatian platonik yang muncul tiba2 (apalagi kalau mereka berdua lagi berantem).

Ketiga...just a waste of time, money and care-ness (kagak ada di kamus)...you can spend it with somebody more worthwhile.

Ke empat.....Masih banyak cewe lain di luar sana sedang menunggu duit dan waktu elo hehehehehe.....ingat sensus penduduk terakhir cowo banding cewe masih 1 : 3 so...masih minimal 2 lagi cewe di luar sana menunggu elo.Ga worth it kalau elo ketemu sama cowo yang komentar di atas itu hihihiihihihi.

Ke lima....the last but not the least.....berhenti mempermainkan perasaan seseorang, kalau elo kagak suka diperlalukan seperti itu...jangan memperlakukan orang seperti itu.

-= What goes around, comes around =-